shlabam replied to your photo: I took ten minutes to go through my inbox and…

How are you sitting on 77 messages in your inbox?

Most of ‘em are half-hearted conversations that I just can’t bring myself to delete. Also there were about 50 from one person but his tumblr got deleted. The messages disappeared with it but the number stayed the same, so it’s REALLY like having 27.

It’s mostly because I’m a hoarder, though.

softcastle-mccormick:

shlabam:

Here’s my problem with How I Met Your Mother.

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YES. A thousand times yes.

shlabam:

You’re friends with this roommate. He’s a cool guy. He’s such a cool guy, that one day, he buys a vacuum cleaner for your place.

It’s a very functional vacuum cleaner. It gets the job done. You and your housemates love it. And it was a really cool thing for your roommate to do, to buy this vacuum cleaner for the house to use. Everyone uses it regularly for years.

Then, one day, you find out this roommate has been masturbating with the vacuum cleaner. It started off just every now and then, but now it’s a pretty regular thing. He’ll take it into his room and make it all gross.

Now, you don’t like this, of course. Neither do the rest of the people you live with. Who would? That’s disgusting, to jerk off with a vacuum cleaner like that. Other people want to use it.

Then again, he did buy the vacuum cleaner. He offered to share it with you guys, and you’ve been using it, but now it’s kind of ruined because you found out what else it’s being used for. But it’s his vacuum cleaner to ruin.

You almost want to grab him by the shoulders and shout “Hey idiot, maybe stop being pathetic, sticking your dick in the fucking vacuum cleaner, and go get a fucking girlfriend or something”, but then you remember that it’s not your vacuum cleaner and he can do whatever he wants with it. Furthermore, he’s tried going out and meeting girls, and it never ends well, so he just comes back home to the vacuum cleaner.

It’s gross and it’s sad, and even though you’ve come to really like the vacuum cleaner, you have to accept that it’s not yours to make decisions about and leave it alone.

This is basically how I feel about how George Lucas has handled the Original Star Wars Trilogy.

A girl super-complimented it after you left.

RAD RAD RAD. Did she talk about the perspective on the right leg or any of the “technical” shit or did she just like the colors? Because I’m super proud of that perspective, dang.

I’d say there’s actually a fair amount of belief of hierarchy among nerdfighters. I repeatedly see GIF sets of John Green deriding or insulting people who are stupid or have stupid hobbies. It’s just hard to have a movement built around being nice.

This is what I don’t like! It’s all, “Hey, I was made fun of for having the ‘wrong’ hobbies but guess what: I think your hobbies are wrong! What now?” (or, “I just want to be accepted so I’m gonna start my own club and exclude you!” It never works out well, did you learn nothing from Saturday morning cartoons?)

The problem is the word “Nerd,” I think. Given its derogatory history, it’s a divisive word used to define a specific group of people.

John Green was spot-on when he said, “Being a nerd means you like things,” because being a nerd does mean you like things. Yet they (apparently) have to be the weird things, thecounterculture, the intellectual, the crafty, the lesser-known, the hobbies of the underdogs. Jock sports nerds and mainstream pop culture nerds and grease-monkey car nerds and yuppie tech nerds are goddamn everywhere, but they’re not accepted as part of the “nerd culture” (as far as I’ve seen) because they’ve been on top already (really because they sneer at the D&D basement-dweller nerds, the most-portrayed nerds in recent times). “Nerd” needs to become all-encompassing because anyone can be a nerd as long as there’s passion and knowledge.

The “nerdfighter” movement at large seems like it isn’t about just having passions or passionately liking something anymore, because the truth is practically everybody has a passion. There is hardly anyone who straight-up doesn’t like anything, not even hipsters. So now you have a bunch of underdog nerds with an even more inflated sense of entitlement (we have entitlement issues, you know it’s true) openly hating on “mainstream” nerds and it’s just the same circle with players in different positions.

It’s hard to have a movement based on being nice, but the movement (if you want to call it that) should be focused on self-esteem and self-worth and basically, what Leyla said: not being ashamed to like what you like how you like it. Just applied to everyone.

Hate begets hate, you guys.

shlabam asked: If you were in a bar fight, what TV sitcom cast would you want backing you up?

This is a really good question.

So. Cast, not characters? I’d want Parks and Recreation.

• Amy Poehler would definitely do some of the pre-fight smack talk and a lot of excessive shoving, kicking, and punching.
• Rashida Jones would get insanely vicious with scratching, hair-pulling, and even biting.
• Aubrey Plaza would probably use whatever she could as a weapon, starting with a broken bottle or a bar stool.
• Retta would do things like kick people in the stomach and smash their heads against tables.
• Nick Offerman would bust out some deadly martial arts along the lines of Krav Maga.
• Rob Lowe would bust out martial arts like Judo or Aikido.
• Aziz Ansari would use his spritely figure and speed to draw people into traps (probably set by Ben Schwartz, who would drop trash cans or barrels or something from above).
• Adam Scott would be more standard and punch people a lot. I bet his footwork’s fantastic.
• Chris Pratt would also do a lot of punching but his real specialty would be wrestling.
• Jim O’Heir would probably be decent at smack talk, and maybe he could grab someone and throw them to Retta.

I don’t know how I’d fit in to this. The only “fight” I’ve been in was in seventh grade when this girl insulted my mom so I shoved her and then a yard aide came over and broke it up. I’m pretty sure I’d be the belligerent one shoving and screaming and half-blindly grabbing for weak spots like a throat.

(Also, I guess this mostly works for characters. I haven’t read up on who the cast are in real life.)

Hey, better late than never.

Just a heads-up: when you see me tonight, I’ll be drunkenly praising the pilot episode at least 20% of the time.