You know how it is, right, ladies? You know a guy for a while. You hang out with him. You do fun things with him—play video games, watch movies, go hiking, go to concerts. You invite him to your parties. You listen to his problems. You do all this because you think he wants to be your friend.
But then, then comes the fateful moment where you find out that all this time, he’s only seen you as a potential girlfriend. And then if you turn him down, he may never speak to you again. This has happened to me time after time: I hit it off with a guy, and, for all that I’ve been burned in the past, I start to think that this one might actually care about me as a person. And then he asks me on a date.
I tell him how much I enjoy his company, how much I value his friendship. I tell him that I really want to be his friend and to continue hanging out with him and talking about our favorite books or exploring new restaurants or making fun of avant-garde theatre productions. But he rejects me. He doesn’t answer my calls or e-mails; if we’d been making plans to do something before this fateful incident, these plans mysteriously fail to materialize. (This is why I never did get around to seeing the Hunger Games movie. Not to name any names, but thanks a lot, Tom.) Later, when I run into him at social events, our conversations are awkward and lukewarm. This is because the moment we met, he put me in the girlfriend-zone, and now he can’t see me as friend material.
I must say that I find this really unfair. I mean, I’m a nice girl. I have a lot to offer as a friend, like not being a douchebag and stuff. But males just don’t want to be friends with nice girls like me. They can’t help it, I guess; it’s just how they’re wired, biologically. Evolution conditioned our male hominid ancestors to seek nice girls as mates and form friendship bonds only with the other dudes that they hunted mammoths with. It’s true—I know this because I studied hominids in my fifth-grade science class.
So what’s the answer? Should I take up mammoth-hunting in an attempt to appeal to the friendship centers of men’s primal lizardbrains? Should I keep making guy “friends” and then prevent them from making a move on me by subtly undermining their self-confidence? Should I just give up on those manipulative, game-playing, two-faced bastards once and for all? I don’t know. I mean, I’d really like to have a true friendship with a guy someday, but it’s so hard to trust and respect them when they never say what they mean—and you never know when you might be relegated to the girlfriend-zone.
I know this is meant as satire but it’s also hella accurate.
(via polyverse)
(via remierk)
I don’t understand how to date or why it seems like people are interested in making other people chase information out of them
- “Explore” what your city’s like when only the other unemployed people are around and tell yourself you’re seeing its true nature, even though you’ll only stick to shopping centers
- Realize most of those people are actually shopping, not hungrily staring at retail items, so they probably have jobs
- Realize most of those people don’t want to bond over the kind of soap they use
- Think phony losers to yourself a lot
- Hang out in the local coffee shop
- In said coffee shop, write a novel about your inner angst over being over-intelligent yet underutilized. Brood onto a page
- Realize novel is basic and boring; scrap it. All of it.
- Read over past scraps of half-written stories. Breed self-loathing
- Jealously stare at people obviously on a “business lunch”
- Angrily glower at carefree, happy-go-lucky students probably living off their parents’ dime; forget that you were ever a student
- Perfect your rant against all the world’s injustices
- Realize that while important, research about systematic injustice is really depressing and you’re unlikely to have a fresh take
- Find a lighter topic, like your favorite television show; decide to write thesis-level dissertation
- Marathon your favorite television show for research
- Map out all the plots, subplots, and character relationships in efforts to understand the show’s true meaning
- Write dissertation fueled by stolen cups of whiskey and half-stale cigarettes chain-smoked well after midnight
- Post book online, where a publisher will inevitably stumble upon it. After the Twilight fanfiction, Star Trek slash fiction, and infected recesses of 4chan (which together make the Internet), your dissertation will be a welcome refreshment to the publisher’s brain
- Accept offered and inevitable publishing deal
- Casually brag about now-published book to professors at university functions that have free wine. Ignore questions about your “trendily” unwashed hair and dirty, tattered clothing. Forget that almost all professors have published something
- Insist your favorite show is not only relevant, it is universally relevant because many critical theories neatly attach to the show. Impress professors because of your young age
- Get job as self-indulgent, needlessly stringent professor
- Congratulations! You are now employed
A Glasgow nightclub has installed a two-way mirror which allows male revellers in private booths to spy on unsuspecting women as they visit the toilet! With no notification or signage anywhere in the venue many female club goers have been left feeling embarrassed and used. Although they do briefly show the mirrors in a promo video, the club has been quickly deleting comments and posts on their social media from club goers trying to alert others to the situation. This is pretty much illegal and hugley violates privacy. Thank you The Shimmy Club for giving us a shiny, new, creative and cool take on objectification.
article herei’m never leaving my house again, this world is just too fucked up.
WHAT!?
Some hotels do this too. An easy way to check if a mirror is two way is to put the tip of your fingernail against it. You should be able to tell if it’s double paned or just a normal mirror by looking at it. If you find that the mirror is two-way, do NOT stay at that hotel.
That is not actually an accurate way to check: http://www.snopes.com/crime/warnings/mirror.asp
This shit is seriously fucked up, though
A good way to get through still hating someone is remembering that you’re cooler than them now anyway
NIKKI
(via homicidalbrunette)
